The Nature of Recovery

I have frequently come to the edge of being ready to think about exactly what it means to recover.

1.) Recovery means learning to eat normally, maintaining a stable weight and not obsessing over weight, calories and body shape.
2.) Recovery means learning to accept me, as I am, despite also having a desire to grow and develop as an individual.
3.) Recovery means not hating my body and learning to feel comfortable in my body. It means learning to accept eating as a normal and necessary part of my life.

It is easy for me to figure out how to describe recovery in clear terms when it comes to the stereotypical stuff about eating disorders. But recovery is going to mean a lot more than that. It is going to mean surrendering the entire worldview that I have developed and constructing a new one. MUCH easier said than done. It is going to mean dealing with emotions and events that I have never even broached before. It is going to mean a lot of things that I don't even understand.

And I am scared shitless!